The men in the white suits ...

The men in the white suits that look like they are going in and out of a toxic waste site are in my house ...I told Randy I want some pictures to share on my blog ..I hope he gets some today ...I myself don't dare go back out there after our reaction the other day to my home ..its such a beautiful home and I pray we get to live there when its been cut scraped sprayed air scrubbed of yucky black toxic mold so far they have found mold in the doorway from the laundry room to the hall I was not expecting for them to find mold there , its sounds as if they are being thorough as they follow the trail of mold trail so that makes me feel good ...my sinus's are about clear from out trip there almost a week ago ..wow all those sick years and feelings of dread there and now a answer I feel very blessed sure its taking any money that we have that I could of possably taken a vacation to see the ancient city of Petra I have always wanted to go there and honestly never really thought I would go but thinking about the money we are spending on the house makes me wonder should we have lived more frugal in a smaller home and taken more vacations ??? I don't know I really love my home and our lil piece of land with our seasonal creek I guess u could say many people would pay money to spend a few weeks on our lil piece of Heaven on earth ..

      I have a good and happy life a loving husband awesome kids and now a new chance at a healthy life and I am going to embrace it as I never have before HOPE is so exciting ...

   I am sad that most doctors I have spoke to don't have any thing to say about toxic mold not even a question about it ..they just kind of breeze right over it ..My new prayer is that more people become knowledgeable about it and all the health issues it can cause and even though every one will not have the exact same symptoms when exposed its real very real....

 I am happy that I was able to order and pay for the ERMI testing that I ordered from a website called momsaware if you google them they have lots of great information and you can order the test...

 I am thankful for facebook and the mold awareness groups who honestly helped me keep my sanity in the first week of what I needed to to do ...they are a group of people just like me sick and tired and scared and worried .. I didn't and don't feel alone when I read the posts their and they also helped Randy understand more of what I was going through ....

 I am so happy I have a husband who listened to me and stood by my side ( maybe a bit because he thought I was off my rocker and nuts for running off as I did and might need mental help at some point LOL ) The day I left my home I was very weak both in health and in my mind but I made my decision and I stood by it BTW he has to tell our neighbor friend that I am not a psychotic nut job that neighbor had the joy of happening to be there one day while I stood outside in the rain because I refused to go in the house this was before the ERMI test resuts had come back ...

everyday is one day closer to being home again and I am thrilled about that ...  

More water leaks under the house TOXIC BLACK MOLD

The water damage in our house is much worse than we thought ...the mold remediators are there doing more testing and the whole floor from our bathroom, clear to the dining room is wet from another water leak we didn't even know was there ..I am not sure the leak has even been found yet ...I need to call Randy and get a update ..My most important advice to everyone is when your gut tells you something is wrong, very wrong, follow your instincts...I pray we will get our health back 100% ...I am so glad I left that house as if it was on fire... it was a very hard thing for me to do, just up and tell Randy we were leaving and I would not come back till we found the problem ...I was tired of seeing my kids and me sick all the time....... something was wrong and turns out I was right ...Now I need to look back on my blog and see if my illness started when the water heater leaked and we had it fixed... I know it was around that time ...and that been since 2008 or 2009 ...

Sciatica and mold photos grrrr ...

I have been feeling pretty good since I left the mold house ...then last night Rylan had his 3rd bloody nose since we left 2 weeks ago and my back and scatic nerve are really really hurting today it is the mycotoxins putting up a fight, the yeast, the mold that's in our body's.... I don't know ...Today I will buy lots of yummy organic veggies to juice... lucky Jeanie has the same juicer that I do, so I already know how to use it ...I will also get stated on bone broths, Chicken will be it and I will make yummy healthy foods from it ...

             I have hope for a healthy future for us now that I am 99.9% sure I know what has been making us sick its just going to take time ...oh and lots of money .... Jean said we can stay as long as we need to it will be helpful for us and for her she will be in the rehab for her broken hip about 3 more weeks and this healthy way of eating we are doing again will be very good for her recovery so things are going to work out ... for her and for us !!!

 I recieved the saddest text from Randy last night

**** This is going to be a daunting task. I look around at all the memories, and wonder what we can keep and what must go. I want to wait until we talk to her expert before we throw too much away. I'll get rid of magazines that are of no value, that's easy. But when I see dr. Seuss books and Rylan school books I have a different feeling. Lord help us.****

 That made me cry its very hard to look around your home all the memory's of past trips and gifts from family who have passed on things that really are not replaceable for the feeling you have when you look at them, so those things will be stored untill we can figure out how to clean them or at the very least we will know we still have them we just wont look at them everyday ...My lil Wyatts foot and hand mold , Tegan and Taylors handprint footprint tiles just so many things ...and it not something he can really do his own so I am planning when the weather gets a lil nicer and all the doors and windows can be open I will go in that house to help but I will not allow the boys inside under any circumstance I just read this morning about a 11 year old boy who died at 11 years old he had mold in his bedroom and was healthy till 11 then had a anurisumwas it from the mold or just his lot in life ??? I don't know but I certianly do not want to take a chance Rylan has already lived in it his whole life and it scares me it was hidden you wouldn't even know it was there my house is not like the pictures you would see if you google toxic mold house this is what our mold looks likethis was hidden in my closet behind a rubber maid tote

And this grew after our roof leaked we had the roof replaced last summer but I never knew that this could be hiding mold it just looks water damaged...The way we learned our roof was leaking it the snow melt in 2014 was a drippy mess on our sliding glass doors at first we thought it was from when the deck roof meets the house but that spot on the ceiling that had been the size of a half dollar grew..I believe the roof probably had a lil leak the whole time we have lived there but I can not be sure 

 So you see what I mean and of course I have killed mold spots here and there over the years with bleach and that is a huge no no because once you kill the mold it send off mycotoxins that make you even sick that the mold ughhh ...

Mindi is still so very sick

She has been sick for 3 weeks or more and now vomiting I am just so worried about her went to the ER yesterday becaus eher chest is hurting so much they gave her vicodins and now this morning she is vomiting ...I just need her to get better I am so very very worried ...she stated a new antibiotic thursday and it don't seem to be kicking in yet ..Linecare never delivered her nebulizer I call the docs on friday to tell them and still nothing

A new me

So I was thinking today ...after getting Mindi home and on some good pain meds as I was driving by the hip clothing store over in the old Rite aid complex and realized this is my chance to totally change up my wardrobe, since all my clothes are going in the trash ..what kind of style do I want to be ? I am starting from scratch and not going to have hordes of clothes I never wear ever again.... I want a nice selection of about 20 items to mix and match not my usual clearance isle and goodwill selections...I might be a new and improved version of me soon ...right now we are living in cheap pajamas and 1 pair of pants and a shirt for town but I am going to have to get something soon ...

Run Run as fast as I can .....

Today my Randy finally got to see how our Rylan breathing has improved since we left mold house.. I am so happy.. I was so scared to even leave my home, knowing it was so hard for me to do without my Randy's blessings ...Things are turning for the better he is accepting that it is our house making me and the boys sick and now he seen the proof ...Randy works long hours and we only seen him about 15 minute a night because he is staying at mold house to care for our animals and he works very long hours ...Rylans air hunger is almost completely gone.. though he gets out of breath quickly, while playing, that may be life long I am afraid, since he has lived in that house his whole life ... Randy took him to the park, while I went to the ER with Mindi who has pneumonia ( she does not live with us) So for those who are scared like I was of leaving, and what people think, just give yourself permission to do what feels right in your gut ...My gut said run for your lives, so I did ....

Day 10 out of Mold house

Well its Day 10 out Rylan breathing is finally looking like its improving ...I stll wake up clear headed and thats good Andrew has a bad case of jock itch going and from what I understand yeart and mold go together hand in hand so I am thinking his body is detoxing by doing that he would get that at mold house to along with thrush and I battle yeast as well ...Mindi has been very very sick for the past 3 weeks and is on her 3rd round of antibiotics she does not live in mold house and has not for years she just got some really bad chest thing going on  ..I feel like I will be better able to blog better when my kids are feeling better its very stressful ...Andrew in pain for a year with that stupid boil scare ,Rylan not breathing right , Mindi so sick I think she should be in the hospital and it all scares me to the point that I just have to keep myself calm ...and my eyes still are a bit fuzzy looking at the computer screen hopefully that will improve over time ...Randy and i have not really had time to talk my phone is crap so can't talk on it and he has to rush to mold house everyday to feed the animals ..So our game plan is not set in stone yet ...Still need to talk to the remeiderator guy and find out costs and stuff I want to get a travel trailer to live in on the property and wait till the heat of summer to do the house and give it a good time to completely dry out after all this rain ...